Education
Posted in Random Nonsense on 01/14/2007 09:40 pm by toriBoy, am I paying for it. Having exhausted my ability to defer my student loans in their present state, I’m going to have to start paying back the government for my failed years in college. Not that it’s their problem or that college is the reason for the failure, that’s all on me. It just seems unfair that I need to repay thousands of dollars which netted me no degree.
But, Tori, you ask… couldn’t you just finish college? I really could - I’ve got around 15 more credits to complete in order to get a degree in psychology. But now I’m a mom, a writer, a full time disabled person - I don’t know how much more I can fit on this already sagging paper plate. So I sit here and wonder. If I do get that degree, I’ll be in more debt. More money will need to be borrowed in order for me to finish. Will I make more money if I finish? That I don’t know, because I don’t plan to start working outside the home again until Julia’s at least 5 and in school. Plus, I never know when illness will rear its ugly head again.
So I’ll have to keep thinking on this topic, and paying for mistakes I made in the past. I have to follow through on something in my life.
Technorati Tags: college, student loan, writing, psychology
01/16/2007 at 10:46 pm
I remember the day I sent off the last of the payments for my college loans. It was 11 years after I’d graduated, in the early hours of the morning, and I was sitting at home in front of the computer while my two toddlers were still sleeping. I’d been a stay-at-home mom and full-time freelancer for 5 years at that point, and was literally barefoot and pregnant when I hit “send payment” on that final installment. It killed me to send that money in, because I felt like I had finally had this great, paid-for education and absolutely nothing to show for it. Of course, I was wrong.
Tori, you’re in a new phase of your education now, in a different sort of classroom. You’re still paying tuition, too, it’s just that the currency is different (sleepless nights, worry, and stress as opposed to greenbacks). When your daughter is grown, you won’t feel as though your time spent with her was a mistake, so you shouldn’t feel that way about college either.
Your college education was not a failure, regardless of whether or not you have a piece of paper to show for it. You still had the experiences, and gained more knowledge than you had when you first started. Sure, the payments are a pain in the butt, but you’re already reaping the rewards from it, whether you realize it or not. It’s probably helped make your writing stronger, which is a good thing, because lord knows you need to sell a lot of articles to pay off those damn loans.
So get cracking!